Matchmaker Hyuuga
by Mint Pizza Queen
Summary: Hyuuga is playing matchmaker, Naruto is clueless, Sasuke is pissed, and Lee runs around talking about the flames of youth. Fear the sock puppets. Fear them. ONESHOT. [COMPLETED]


**A/N:** FFN...you're weird. That new embedding your poll into your profile feature is nice, but pointless if it is going to stay in demo mode. So anyway, what I want you guys to do is to vote for which story you guys want me to finish first (this gives me motivation during work! Believe--oh hell no). In case if you don't know what stories I haven't finished yet, here's the list:

The Dobe Blew Up The Uchiha Manor (Naruto - Sasuke x Naruto)  
That's Final (Naruto - Sasuke x Naruto)  
Let's Stay Together (Furuba - Kyou x Tohru)  
It's Never Easy (Harry Potter - Remus-centric)  
Repaying Our Debts (Bleach - Ichigo x Rukia)  
Doors to Their Souls (Naruto - Neji x Sasuke)  
M is for Marauder (Harry Potter - Marauder Era)

You can either review with the vote or PM your choice. Voting ends at the end of November. :) Anyway, enjoy!

**Notes/Warnings:** Crack, OOCness.

Naruto (C) Masashi Kishimoto

* * *

** Matchmaker Hyuuga**  
by _Mint Pizza Queen_

* * *

"I've been watching you, Uchiha."

Sasuke turned with an eyebrow raised at that statement. "Excuse me?"

Neji closed his eyes, smirking. "I've been watching you. From what I've seen, you've got some serious issues."

The Uchiha rolled his eyes. "No, really, you _think_?"

"You're a gool for not telling Naruto."

Sasuke blinked. "What does Naruto--"

"You like him."

The black-haired boy sputtered and choked. "E-excuse me? I think you are bringing up a subject that should be discussed with someone else. Like--that Hinata girl, your cousin, I know she likes the dobe--"

Neji crossed his arms and shook his head. "No, I'm talking about _you_. I've seen you. The looks you give, the pauses, and _the hand that lingers a second too long. _All of that."

Sasuke scowled. "Stalker."

"Merely an observer caught up in a situation where one's eyes are unable to be averted. You know what that's like, don't you?"

"Wha--"

"Of course you do. You know what it's like every time Uzumaki is around."

_Wait._

What the hell?

Sasuke shifted uncomfortably under the piercing gaze before awkwardly pointing at the Hyuuga. "Are you teasing me?"

Neji gave an all-knowing smirk. "Me? Tease? I would never do such a thing. Besides, I think he likes you too."

That was about the point in which Sasuke decided that enough was enough and turned to stalk off and brood, but a hand planted itself on his shoulder.

"Don't mess up, Uchiha."

Sasuke turned to give the Hyuuga a verbal lashing but discovered that he was alone.

_Okay..._

_...again, what the hell?_

"Oi, Sasuke!"

Naruto bounced up, a cheerful expression planted on his face. "Let's go get some ramen!"

Sasuke scowled. "I--" His eye caught something. It was Neji, smirking at him. The Hyuuga pointed a finger at him and waved it mockingly. Sasuke glared at him before looking back to Naruto. "I'll pay."

"Wah!? Really? Thanks! Let's go!" The blond grabbed the Uchiha's hand and began to drag him towards Ichiraku's. Quickly looking back, Sasuke looked to where the Hyuuga had been and saw that he had, yet again, vanished.

-----

"Ah! That was good!" Naruto patted his belly with contentment.

Sasuke sighed, mourning the loss in weight of his wallet. "Are you finished?"

The blond jumped up. "Yup! Let's go train!"

The Uchiha's eye twitched. "No." He really didn't want to train with anyone at the moment. The damn Hyuuga had got him riled up over Naruto liking Sasuke and Sasuke liking Naruto and all that crap.

Stupid Hyuuga's. What did they know about love?

"Aya! Sasuke!" Naruto began to whine, clinging to Sasuke's shirt and started to tug half-heartedly. "I wanna train with you!"

The boy felt his face heat up slightly. Damnit that Hyuuga was messing with his head and was makking him act weird! He went to leave and spotted the same damn Hyuuga peeking at him from behind a stack of crates. Said Hyuuga waggled a finger at him.

Fed up, Sasuke looked to Naruto and sighed. "We can train later. See...if you train after eating so much, you could get sick."

The blond formed an 'o' with his lips in understanding. "Okay! Then what do you want to do?"

Sasuke looked over to Neji who had somehow procured two socks and was making them perform obscene activities. He gave him a 'what the hell are you smoking' look and grabbed the boy's arm. "Let's go--wander around a bit. If we find something interesting, then we'll do that." He turned his head to the Hyuuga and stuck his tongue out at him.

The Hyuuga merely had a sock wave at him.

-----

"Yosh! Naruto, it's good to see you!"

"AAAAAAAH!"

"Wait! Come back!" Lee chase after Naruto, who bolted at the sight of bowl cut and bushy brows. "Let us partake in the discussion of youth! Naruto!"

Tenten sweatdropped. "Heh, what can you do? Lee gets excited very easily."

Naruto bounded over and put himself behind the Uchiha, forcing Sasuke to be his shield against Mr. Youth-Loving-Guy.

Lee stopped by Tenten on his chase. "Oi! Neji! Sasuke and Naruto are here!"

Sasuke's eye twitched at the name, yet no one thankfully noticed.

Neji turned from where he appeared to have been training with kunai. "Greetings to you both."

"Hiyah, Neji!" Naruto beamed. Then he elbowed Sasuke. "Say hi."

Sasuke grunted at the blond before looking to the Hyuuga. "Hello." He froze.

Neji was smirking at him. His mouth opened and he began to mouth something to the Uchiha.

_'You know you waaant him. You know you looove him. You know you waaant him--in your bed at niiight.'_

Sasuke's face burned and he quickly looked away.

"So what brings the two of you here?" Tenten put her hands on her hips as she struck up a conversation.

"Just wandering around!" Naruto grinned. "Just, you know, looking for something to do."

"Ah, sounds like fun."

As they delved deep into conversation, Sasuke looked over to Neji who had resumed his training. Seemingly _knowing_that Sasuke was looking, the Hyuuga turned with a deadly gleam in his eye.

_'Say it.'_

Sasuke shook his head slowly.

The Hyuuga glared. _'He likes you, fool!'_

Again, he shook his head.

Neji was getting impatient. _'Why won't you admit it?'_

_'Why don't you mind your business?' _Sasuke hissed back.

The Hyuuga scowled before the gleam reappeared. _'Ah, you're shy.'_

Sasuke's eye twitched.

_'Don't worry, I'll tell him for you."_

The Uchiha shook his head a little faster. _'No!'_

_'Yes.'_

_'No!'_

_'Yesssss...'_

"NO!" Sasuke spat, shocking Naruto, Lee, and Tenten.

"Um--no what? I only offered to bake cookies." She blinked, eyes wide in fright.

"You asshole!" Sasuke whipped a finger viciously at the smirking Hyuuga. "You're going down!" With that, he took a flying leap at Neji.

Naruto instantly freaked out. "SASUKE! HAVE YOU LOST YOUR MIND!?"

Neji didn't mind one bit. In a matter of seconds, he had the rampaging Uchiha pinned.

"Now, Sasuke, wouldn't this be the perfect moment?"

"No!" He snapped. "Shut up!"

Lee blinked. "Perfect moment for what?"

Neji poked Sasuke on the back of the head. "To tell Naruto of course!"

"Tell me what?" The blond quirked an eyebrow. "Sasuke, what's going on?"

Neji leaned towards the Uchiha and whispered in his ear. "You're all set! Don't mess up. I'll kick your ass if you do."

Sasuke harrumphed with annoyance. "I hate you."

"I know because you love Naruto."

"HE WHAT!?"

"HYUUGA!"

"Aw, how sweet!"

"The flames of passion and youth!"

"Told you it'd work."

"Get lost, Hyuuga."

**-End-**


End file.
